How To: Make an X-Ray Lampshade

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Design R.E.   Make J.F.
 
Staying true to the creepy subtext of this issue, why not make a lampshade out of the old x-rays at the bottom of your wardrobe? Sure, it’s only six months early for Halloween, and all your super boring acquaintances will think you’re a type of goth/steam punk but really… you know it’s just a cool way to frame the frailty of the human condition. The better the break the more unique the lamp!
 
Cost $5 | Time 3 hours

What You’ll Need
-2 x large X-Rays -Hole Punch -Stapler -Compass -Drill  -Jigsaw -4m of nylon twine -3 to 4mm thick ply board

-Safety goggles

Step 1 
Take your two large X-rays and arrange them lengthways with ends overlapping by at least 2cm. Take time to get the X-rays straight, before stapling together to form a cylinder. The X-rays are still bendy and won’t form a perfect circle. Stand the cylinder on your ply board and attempt to make the cylinder as close to a circle at its base as possible. Lightly trace around the base with a pencil to form the lid of the lamp shade. Alternatively you could use a compass to measure the radius and then get a perfect circle then cut out with your jigsaw, which we would have done but didn’t have a big enough compass. Be sure to don goggles.

Step 2 
Using the compass, trace a circle 1.5cm inside the edge of your lid and mark this circle with your pencil at 2cm intervals. These will form the eyelets for threading your string in Step 4. Count the number of marks you’ve made and make the same number of holes in the X-ray cylinder. Using a ruler and pen, mark the eyelets at 2cm intervals. Pushing the hole punch as far over the X-ray as you can will result in an even line of eyelets. Be careful when drilling through the thin ply board as it’s fragile. 
 

 

Step 3 
All standard light fittings have a plastic casing which unscrews around the neck of the globe. We are using this to attach the lampshade to the light fitting. Unscrewing the plastic collar, take the diameter of the light fixing with your compass then trace the hole you’ll drill to fit the lampshade lid. Using a large drill bite, bore out the hole carefully and add a further 4-5 large holes around the centre to release the globe’s heat. Fit the ply board over the light fitting and screw the plastic collar back on to fix the board in place.

 

Step 4 
Thread the nylon twine over and through the eyelets of both the X-ray cylinder and the ply board top. Finally, hang the shade in your bedroom against a backdrop of classic horror film posters to execute that authentic creepshow anatomist ambiance you’ve always desired.