Top Five Australian Political Slag Offs Ever

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Let’s face it, the best part about Australian politics is when our elected officials start slagging each other off in Parliament. And what a proud history of slagging off we have in Canberra. As a kind of salute, we now give you the finest five purveyors of abuse ever to stand under the big flagpole. I’m getting all misty-eyed. 
 
 

PETER WALSH

Holder of the glorious record of most reprimands from the Chair of the Senate, Walsh was told off an enviable 48 times during his 12-year term. Among his greatest hits: 
  • “vexatious geriatric”, 
  • “wretched creature”, and 
  • “bullshit.” 
 

MARK LATHAM

The biggest near-miss in Australian political history, this self-confessed “hater” managed to come out with more than a few moments of embarrassment.
  •  On then-PM John Howard: “Howard is an arse-licker. He went over there (to the US), kissed some bums, and got patted on the head.”
  •  To Phillip Ruddock: “Take your badge off, Adolf.”
  •  On former Liberal president Tony Staley (who used crutches as a result of a car accident): “(a) deformed character”. 

GOUGH WHITLAM

Probably not surprising is that Latham was a protégé (and “former friend”) of Whitlam’s. Old Gough sure knew a thing or two about the fine art of slagging off (although he was probably a bit more eloquent than Latham).
  • To a heavy drinking opponent:
       Whitlam: “Look at his bleary face.”
       Snedden: “You are being gutless.”
       Whitlam: “It is what he put in his guts that rooted him.”
  • Paul Hasluck (to Whitlam): “You are one of the filthiest objects ever to come into this chamber!”
       Whitlam: (throws glass of water in Hasluck’s face) 

MICK CONSIDINE

The Irish-born Considine was strong union advocate who was in and out of gaol during his illustrious early 20th Century career. He was forced to resign from the Labor Party in 1920 due to “internal strife”, and – incidentally – is also the only Member of Parliament ever to be suspended three times during the same session.
  • "Bugger the King, he is a bloody German bastard.” (Considine was sent back to gaol for three weeks for this one.) 
  • Considine was later suspended from Parliament for making the wild allegation that the Australian Government was funding the anti-Bolshevik forces in Russia.

PAUL KEATING 

Surely the master of all slagging off in any Parliament anywhere in time or space, we salute Keating the most briskly of all the names on this list.
  • On then-PM Malcom Fraser: “‘Son, if I had a dog with eyes as close together as that, I would shoot it.’
  • On then-Opposition leader Dr John Hewson: “A dog with a belly full of piss.”
  • On then-PM John Howard: “But I will never get to the stage of wanting to lead the nation standing in front of the mirror each morning clipping the eyebrows here and clipping the eyebrows there with Janette and the kids: It's like 'Spot the eyebrows'.”
  • "Laurie Oakes [is] a cane toad."
  • To a Uni student protesting about fees: “Go and get a job!”